If Mark Davis calls, don’t even touch your cellphone

Assistant coaches want to become head coaches. It’s instinctive, though there are instances in which it is akin to standing in a snowstorm and commanding the sun to show itself.

So, it is hardly surprising to read that just about everyone currently on an NFL coaching staff has been mentioned as a possible head coach for the Oakland/Los Angeles/Oakland/Las Vegas Raiders. Gruden had no option but to resign after emails revealing his inner Neanderthal were made public in October.

Gruden is suing the NFL, alleging that the league made the emails public to force the Raiders to fire him. He must fight someone over this since the emails in question strongly suggest That Gruden’s heart holds special places for racism, homophobia, and misogyny.

If the Raiders don’t want to rehire Gruden, is there an NFL team out there sufficiently restless to court him?

The Detroit Lions, clinging to a twig to avoid tumbling off the NFL mountain, don’t count.

Then again, the prospect of hauling in a racist, homophobic, misogynistic coach who has a good shot at turning a football trash heap into a winner may seem reasonable after so many awful seasons.

Meanwhile, Raiders owner Mark Davis is looking for a head coach and general manager. He welcomed the new year by firing his last GM, Mike Mayock. Interim head coach Rich Bisaccia cleaned up the PR rubble created by Gruden and guided the Raiders into a playoff spot. Players have been openly campaigning for Davis to keep Bisaccia as the head coach.

Maybe Davis is determined to return to a head coach/GM operation. Maybe he likes the idea of paying one salary for two positions. Maybe he is simply blowing smoke by leaking a boatload of names as evidence that he will do anything to make his club a championship contender.

Or maybe Davis just doesn’t know what he wants to do.

None of the above should matter to Josh McDaniels, who is said to be a leading candidate for the head coaching spot. ESPN reporter Adam Schefter, who knows what NFL execs are thinking before they do, also reports that Patriots player personnel executive Dave Ziegler is being sought to lead the front office. And third-year Patriots assistant coach Jerod Mayo has been offered a sit-down with Davis.

One observer’s advice to them all: Don’t go to Las Vegas unless you are itching to spend a few days on the Strip.

All this came to mind after reading a report that Bill O’Brien could return as the Patriots offensive coordinator.

O’Brien has a way to go in eliminating the stench brought on by his Texans’ tenure as head coach.

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